Friday, August 29, 2008
10:01 PM

i'm a plate breaker.
(but more of a heartbreaker actually)
i guess i'm quite clumsy today. :D
was washing up the dishes today, and i had butter fingers...
the whole glass plate broke and cut my forehand.
it took me a moment to register what was happening, around 30 seconds until i saw drops of red blood trickling down.
my poor, poor, red blood cells. 
i hope all the thrombokinase are doing their job. :D
anyway, i didn't manage to visit my former school, IJ Kellock.
had some stuff going on after teachers' day celebrations, but i felt it was rather worth it.
not rather, very worth it.
i feel so proud of them! :D
and i know that they can really perform outstandingly and do it well.
sweep them off their feet man! :D 
i've got absolute faith in you guys!
rock on peopleeeeee! :D
and i don't even feel the slightest ounce of burden on my shoulders today.
which is probably a very good thing. :D
high heels, red dress.
i am so going mad.

When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
Thursday, August 28, 2008
11:38 PM

and i just can't seem to pull myself away.
if i told you that i'm going to fail my promotion 100%, will you see me as a person with no confidence?
be it or not, i think i screwed it up.
the rifle almost dropped, luckily i saved it.
and phew, i kept my cool expression.
hope they didn't mark me down so badly for that.
confidence is the ultimate key to everything.
but i don't think this is the scenario anymore.
i wonder why they laugh.
is it that funny?
is it that funny?
it's not funny at all.
we're being so serious, and maybe, they think it's funny. 
______ it.
i do remember somebody telling me that when we give orders, it should be in a clear, accurate tone with a strong emphasize on the last word.
yes, they achieved it, but apparently it was like a bullet train that nobody could catch.
am i complaining?
yeah, i think i am.
but i'm sure that many of us feel this way.
this whole respect thing is really absurd. 
utterly preposterous.
and i'm not going to say anything about it.
just think about it man.
how would you feel if you were commanding and we were laughing.
just think about it.
no comments.

When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
9:22 PM

i'm so addicted,
you're everything i want.
no complications, you know you had me from the jump,
i'm so addicted, do what you wanna do,
i'm committed, addicted to you.
i have no idea what to write.
i need my hyperness. now.
wished some kind of samba fish would just appear in front of me right now.

When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
8:09 PM

just how we used to be.
i shouldn't have done that, said that.
Np was... not that bad.
i get feelings attached rather quickly.
and yes, i'm already attached to my squad already.
and they're like a part of you. 
i anticipate each training everyday, i really do.
it just excites me that i'm teaching the squad something new, and make a difference in their training.
but surprise, surprise, i've just found out that i'm demoralising them instead.
i don't know, but i felt like... a little taken aback.
i thought everything i did was for their good,
and i thought it would benefit them...
and never did i think that they would actually feel like this.
oh jeez, i never meant them to feel that way.
and i shouldn't have cried.
pearllyn maam told me that being an NCO or worse still, the head, i have to be er, mentally and emotionally strong.
but that's the weak in me you see.
i get hurt and soft-hearted easily.
and i'm not even supposed to unleash any emotion in front of them.
blah. but it all doesn't really matter now, does it?
well, let's just take it that it was a lesson that was meant to be.
and i'm...really really sorry, it's not your fault, but it sounds like i haven't found the way to handle and bring out the full potential of you all yet.
and thanks zakiah for waiting with me while talking to her.
i really didn't expect you to be there with me,
but i really do appreciate it.
seems like you're the one truly there for me whenever i needed somebody.
thank you so much for making me confirm one thing: you're a real true, splendid, marvellous friend.
rock on girl! i'd be behind you forever.
and of course, my my dearest meiyi and geraldine.
thanks for that little surprise, haha.
i didn't know how to deal with it.
but i really gotta thank you two.
been with me the toughest patch of my np life, 
and i really owe it to you people.
thanks for coming over to comfort me.
i never thought how happy i was to see you!
and of course, how can i forget my dearest AOIC.
thanks for the refreshing H2O you offered me. :D
maybe next time i shall have more bad moods and you can offer me more of your drinks :D
and, tada! the super powerful nco! syahirah!
thanks for taking the squad, of course, zakiah too, i wouldn't even have the courage to carry on without you two.
thank you for taking the squad with me, just, thank you really much.
and of course! yvelyn and daphne!
thank you for making me laugh like some hyena with those goofy 'i-love-you' acts of yours!
really, i did cheer up, you guys are really great! :D
and edlyn, try not to think about your a maths okay?
i know that grades are important, but sometimes...they aren't everything. and yes, i'm trying to believe in that too. 
thank you chan yen for sharing the tablet with me for the olympic videos! and of course, you are really intelligent! always get A1 for everything! :D thanks for the guidance in maths and everything else. you're really superb. :D
of course, sophy!!! you've been a real great partner, i have to admit. sitting without you makes me feel lonely and misses you a lot. (hahhahhaha) yeah, you're a really great person! thanks for sharing your breakfast with me even though i've already eaten mine! :D and thanks for lending me everything when i needed it, and thanks for clearing my doubts when i had one.
i owe part of my results to you dudette! :D thank you very much! arigato!
thanks liana!!!!!! ahhahaha, for playing that song on the piano. seeing you so determined to get that song right even though you have no piano background made me feel motivated and encouraged to hang on my thinning passion for piano. you made me feel like music's the greatest thing ever, so thanks a lot! you're good at piano, really! :D
and ANN! :D the super lame ex-co! :D hahahahhaha i loved sharing the mee siam with you! and of course, your spastics comments and your high pitched 'No!' made me quite awake during lessons sometimes :D you work really great with kana :D 
KANAAAAA! :D hahahhahahha, 'you're damn retarded luh' as quoted by nisa. :D hhhahhaha, apparently your 'shhhhhhhh keep quiet' attempts to quieten the class doesn't really work, but i overheard mdm yeoh praising you for your emaths results! i know you can do it! :D
WOOOOOOOO. my olympics crazed partnerrrr :D thanks for the campcraft days! you were one of the main reasons why i wanted to come down! :D i bet you never knew that.
and there's mainly the friends i made over NPCC, i really don't know what to say, but you all helped me out a lot in sorting my life out. you know who you are, so, i don't have to say it. :D but thanks again, especially yy. you did lots for me, it's time i repay you back though :D
and for those that i missed out, your existence play a great part in my life, in some way or another.
and my jie jie! thank you thank you for tolerating my never ending flow of physics questions and biology questions and helping me in almost every subject! :D i love you! :D and you're really a cool sister who loves to poke me in the stomach :/ hahahhaha, but rock on man, continue to be the first in physics and econs!
MAMA AND PAPAAAA :D thank you thank you for giving birth to me into this beautiful world! and thank you for bringing me up even though i caused many problems for all of you. thank you for not giving up on me, and thank you for supporting my decisions and respecting my own private needs. thank you for disciplining me and moulding me into what and who i am today!
thank you myself for looking at the bright side of life. thank you myself for hanging on.
you have no idea how blessed i feel now, to have such wondrous friends out there and a great superb family whom i love very much.
confessions of an amended heart. <3

When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
Saturday, August 16, 2008
11:37 PM

and i love you,
just the way you look tonight.
black looks great on me, i have to admit. HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA.
anyway, today's my mom's BIG DAY! --> WOOHOO! HER MAJESTY'S BIRTHDAY!
we went out to bugis junction, second floor --> Seafood Harvest, to pamper ourselves with seafood luxury, muahahahahhahha.
i remember i went there with a flat stomach, returned with a rather rounded stomach :D
the ambience was great, with lighted candles dancing in the air, casting faded silhouettes of the glasses nearby, and there was soft music playing overhead.
it was, sigh, romantic.
we met my mother's friend and had dinner with her.
it was her treat, so haha! :D
i'm not that mean, don't worry.
first we started off with soups, a great appetizer i feel, and my soup was....irresistible and tempting to the sense of smell and taste. 
i knew, instantly, that i would marry a chef someday :D a pilot is not that bad either i suppose :D
OHHH KIMBERLY! remember our pact to have a huge, big contingent of kids okay! 
hahahaha, moving on, we had deluxe seafood platter,
where lobsters with spaghetti, fried squid rings, clams and oysters bathed in lemon squeezes and a couple of some parts of a lobster were served together with tartar sauce, mayonnaise and some weird sauce with garlic.
let me tell you this.
this, is much much better than anything else in the world.
the satisfaction of  the juices oozing out from the oysters, leaving a remarkable sensational taste lingering on your tongue.
that is so much that you can ask for.
and the lobsters, they are to die for, really.
just cooked, they were steaming and ready for some guilty little pleasures.
the meat of their claws were so tender, so fresh, and so QQ, and dear god, the sweetness of the meat is enough to make your knees shiver with delight.
next up, we had our main course.
my sister had crawfish pasta with black pepper, my dad had this huge seafood combo set, mother was enjoying her chicken, her friend eating an intellectual meal of sirloin steak.
and whereas for me, MUAHAHAHAHA, i indulged myself with catfish and sirloin steak with brown sauce. 
damn that thing, it makes me feel like food is the only thing that can cheer me up after a long tiring day of NP.
the steak, cooked medium, is heaven to your senses. 
i have no idea how to describe it,'s like the rich smooth sauce slithering down your throat, warmth engulfing your throat....that kind of feeling.
it's way much better than anything else and it seduced me.
couldn't get enough of it, wanted more and more and more of it :)
but you all get the idea of it?
seriously, i would recommend this place to you.
the service is fantastic, the waiters/waitresses are very polite, they treat you as if you are a valued customer.
it's a great experience, so go there soon.
but of course, it's quite costly, so, going there once in a while is something worth looking forward to.
and mom! i hope you like my present!
though it's simple, but i really did dedicate my whole afternoon into it :)
and i really really love you a lot.
i just do.
and thank you so much for doing the housework even though you're tired from work.
and i wanna thank you for not giving up on me when your umbilical cord was tightly wounded round my neck.
thank you for giving birth to me! :D
i love you, i really do. :)
happy birthday to mommy!

When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
Friday, August 15, 2008
11:17 PM

i can't sleep.
i can't sleep.
i can't freaking sleep.
common tests are finally over, nada, zip.
bio sucked big-time, not to mention geography, history, social studies, a maths (carelessness -_-) and of course, darling physics.
but heck them, move on with life.
so, went to visit my dear old grandma.
dear god! she looked so...don't know how to describe her.
but she makes me feel like family warmth is always there.
ate her speciality dishes, and yes, they are fulfilling to the senses of the tongue and my hunger deprived stomach.
so irresistibly tempting to eat and gobble everything up, but i'm a gracious young woman that remains civilised and disciplined enough to show table manners.
i missed my grandma.
and she watches the olympics!
seemed like my aunt went to watch dark knight with her, haha, she's really a rocking good o'grandma.
sa rang hae yo granny ssi!
and then, i was bored, couldn't sleep due to dont know what reasons.
finally i went to visit tickle and took some quizzes! hahahahha.
Here's a test: Naughty or Nice.
and here are my results: (muahahahhaha)

Not Half Bad

But you're not all good either. Even if most people think you're a bit of a goody twoshoes, we know better. Sure, you're generally a by-the-book, law-abiding model citizen, but every once in a while you like to break a rule or three. Skinny dipping? Done it. Had one drink too many? Guilty as charged. But chances are that's pretty much the worst of it.We all have a few skeletons in our closet, but when it comes down to it, you're a nice person. You wouldn't dream of making a serious play for your best friend's squeeze, and you always pay your traffic fines — speeding and parking tickets. It's a good balance, so keep it up!

see, i'm not totally good :)

time to unleash the 'bad girl' in me, but, that should be unleashed only after finals.

i am so darn bored and dead.

why why why why why.

like i feel like something is missing a lot.

can't figure what is it.

and also, hahahah, got feedback from my friends.

they claimed that my blog was very unlike the hyped me.

oh wells, people are weird, go figure that out.

but seriously, i'm feeling exceptionally dead.

and pocketful of sunshine by natasha bedingfield is looping in my head.

and here are some lyrics i found it quite inspiring:

take me away,

a secret place.

a sweet escape,

take me away.

take me away

to better days

take me away,

a higher place

and then the remix version of britney's gimme more was utterly disgusting. goodness. gracious. momma mia.

the original version is much much nicer to listen too.

but britney, just keep rocking on.

stay strong girl, and don't care about what the others say.

they don't even know a damn-ed thing about you.

and yvelyn liann!

cheer up okay, even though you didn't really get desired results for chemistry,

but it's really nothing, and it's common tests.

and i'm also trying to brainwash myself this fact too because i have complete confidence that i'm am going to achieve single digit no. for my bio test.

so, yeah, just be that crazy little girl you are who drinks chicken essence and eats that disgusting herb everyday! :D


hang in there girl, together you and i are going to make a great comeback.

i believe i can, and you can too! :D

moving on, i think orals are a great way of de-stressing myself.

like one of the times you can be truthful of everything and spit them out in words formation.

am i not making sense? yeah, probably i am not, because apparently my fingers have this superpower ability that enables them to continue hammering on the keyboard.


congrats to singapore's women ping pong's team!

you guys really made it to the top of the top, and just hang in there and persevere on!

a gold means a lot to singapore, and i'm sure it means more to you all than anybody else!

and congrats to michael phelps. he really did america proud, hahahaha.

6 gold medals! man, that is really a bomb out there.

and lastly i'd like to thank myself for putting my maximum effort in everything i do.

it's been a long day.

long journey.


i am blabbering nonsense. goodness gracious.


help me.

When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
10:26 PM

take a bow,
because the stage's about to collapse.
yeah, nisa, we know he really makes the whole pool hot because of his extreme hotness mannnn! :D
can;t believe he did that kind of wow-tastic DIVE!
all the way, daley! your fans here are realll supportive of you! WOOTS!
okay, should stop obsessing about him, :D
and and and and i really really really like to see the men gymnastics competition!
they are really nice to watch, ahahhha, not mentioning ogling (HAHA) at their muscular frames, but also, the gracefulness of their dismounts and movements and GAHHHHHH.
i need to stop hyperventilating, really.
even though you're 4th, but it's pretty alright!
all of you did real extremely well and excellent job! :D
*screams and shouts and cheer!*
you two really rocked the whole competition okay!
love love to see your performances! they're really awesome!
how i really wished that those two could just keep performing and performing and performing. :D
and olympics is really distracting me from my studies.
hmm, i admit it: i slacked from 4pm to 5pm because my eyes were lured to the television.
okay! back to normal life:
english was pretty much okay...and chemistry! 
i shall remember that nitrogen gas always have 3 bonds! :D
oh yeah, and my idol for the day is: ah peks and ah-mas in china and everybody in china
because, they actually went to learn english just for the olympics!
was watching some chinese news earlier on, and they showcased this old man, around his 80s speaking real good perfect english! :D
this kind of learning spirit is really admirable.
GO CHINA! Bring out the best that you can and rock the universe yeah!
and i'm quite surprised that some people don't even care about the olympics at all :/
it's such a goddamn huge big event, and it's like...something that is what i feel, more worth it to watch than the World Cup. (but i still like football! Barcelona!!!!!!!!! WOOTS!)
and! one last thing to add!
i feel very proud of myself! :D
apparently, not procastinating today at all made me finish my revision in 2 hours time and i actually managed to study a bit of amaths and history. 
which means i just need to do more concentration on physicsssss (YUCK) and a maths and history!
and i have no idea why i'm so HAPPY today :D
maybe it's because i realised that i could do splits at any direction i want, hahahahahha. :D
anyway, common tests to be over in 4 days!
you have a gift of seeing the optimistic sides of life, and have the ability of being cheerful. remember, it is a gift because not many people in our society is able to do that. make good use of this gift and spread happiness to those around you. though you cannot affect everyone in this world, but your efforts will go a long way.
- as told by a very famous, wonderful, fun-tastic ancient friend :D 

When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
Saturday, August 9, 2008
5:18 PM

ohh baby it's all right now you ain't gonna flaunt to me,
we can go dutch you can still touch my love for free.
we can work without the perks just you and me,
thug it out till we get it right!
the topic sentence for today is: jiaxuan had been a cold, ungrateful heartless bitch that doesn't make time for friends due to her selfishness.
evidence: i don't like to be blocked in the past but i'd want to move on.
elaboration: this shows her total unwillingness to actually get back together with her old friends due to her outside commitments. she neglects her friends and yet chooses to do her assignments over them. this elaborates and emphasizes her ungratefulness for the things she has done, afterall, her friends had put in so much effort to sustain this friendship, but she herself chooses to walk away and put the past behind her.
link: jiaxuan is an unworthy friend that doesn't deserves to taste and experience the true essence and core of real friendship.
i supposed you got a picture of how i was like.
yes, this was me just a few moments ago,
but then, after some real consideration and serious thought about the past few things that has happened,
i've decided something.
friends or life?
you decide for myself.
well, i decided both.
life is nothing without friends.
friends are life. 
well, of course, i have to give my heartfelt thanks to this person.
knocked some sense into me and made me realised how foolish and stupid and ignorant i was to actually neglect my bestest friends, that are still so incredibly amazing at lightening up my spirits. 
to siying, jessica, jocelyn and edlyn, i'm sorry for fucking up.
you guys are really great, i have to admit it.
you all made me realise how friends can make my life so colourful.
you all made me understand and taste true friendship.
you all once made me feel like standing up during the lowest point of my life.
and i still can remember that moment after lit final year we tore macbeth notes into the yellow dustbin!
i can still remember so many things, my darlings.
i have no idea why i was feeling like that just now.
it can be, haha, really interesting to see how amazingly dumb i was.
and surprisingly, this load on my shoulders, it's much lighter.
and i want to thank each and one of you, for making me see the light, and to actually understand that precious thing i was missing.
i know it sounds really cheesy and everything but, really, you guys made me feel like i was on cloud nine, no doubt, with edlyn's mama-mia! and 'i'm a mother of four kids' character, jessica's goofy moments, jocelyn's crazy behaviour and siying, my dear dear dear husband, hahhah, who make me feel like, wow, she is my friend.
yeah, and now i feel ashamed.
i don't really deserve to have this kind of precious, rare friendships.
guilt isn;t what i'm really feeling, but i just want to let you all know that, i'm willing to get everything back.
i'm really willing to.
and i will always, forever, love all of you.
you guys all made a mark in my life, and you all forever will.
i therefore give you all a toast.
to everlasting friendship!

When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
10:49 PM

shine my way through out of this maze,
i need directions.
some kind of beam of light to shine me out.
everything's falling apart.
in my hands.
no, you don't, you don't know how that feels.
to see everybody taking their bows, leaving the stage that everybody once worked so hard for.
is that it?
no, not yet, but i don't understand.
i never did.
i've never intended to.
personally i myself would want to take a bow too and leave the stage and leave the room and shut the door and let those problems escalate by themselves.
but that's too selfish, isn't it?
friends, cca....these two things are the biggest headaches in my life.
it feels heavy.
and i don't want to carry these burdens no more.
feel the slightest temptation to take it off and walk away.
that's right, i am complaining.
complaining is never my forte,but somehow today it seems like it's the only thing that i can talk about.
you know that feeling of watching your own loved ones dying away, their lives slowly slipping away?
it's what i'm feeling.
don't wanna feel this no more.
don't wanna think about it.
don't wanna talk about it
don't wanna face it no more
don't wanna do this anymore.
and a lot of don't wannas i would like to drone on and on with.
i'm feeling the worst of the worst.
probably because i feel that i've disappointed someone and made her feel like she's chosen the wrong person to do the job.
but i can't deny the truth.
because i really think she did.
and if i don't stop underestimating myself, i think she really will think that way.
so i shall stop.
but i know someone who can do it, though she has her reasons of not being one now.
but think about, she's the perfect being that anyone else can imagine.
please,correct me if i am wrong, but i think i really need to shove this reality up my ass and start acting i'm one real leader. 
yeah, i probably should.
for the little girl inside who won't just hide.

When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
Sunday, August 3, 2008
12:21 AM

happy birthday erge!!!!
i've got something to confess:
hell of a waking up time yeah?
yep, and best thing was, i was supposed to turn up for chemistry extra lessons.
i had overslept. how responsible.
BUT. i did my fair share of work at home okay.
marking my physics workbook wasn;t how i wanted to spend my saturday afternoon.
but then, the turning point of saturday was....*drumroll* going to my aunt's big big terrace house to celebrate er-ge's birthday!!!
it was helluva birthday party with many alcoholic drinks and food
yum yum yum, so much for being deprived of food on friday night.
you know, coke with whisky tastes funny,
and the red wine was okay.
then i had whisky on the rocks.
super bitter, but then afterwards i kind of got used to it and it was woahhhhhh heavenly.
oops, hope the cops won't catch me.
but don't drink whisky with a HUGE GULP. 
trust me, you'll definitely get drunk. :D
the food was totally techno and superbly delicious.
my cousin had to help me close my jaws. :D
there were mee siam, cocktails, curry, sausages, CHOCOLATE FONDUE!!!!! (WOOTS!), and grass jelly, spring rolls, chicken wings, otah, satay....
damn it, that's what i call heaven on earth!
i was incredibly high, i really don't know why. but the feeling was good, probably due to the effects of alcohol. luckily i didn't drive on the streets of singapore or i'll be like dead (X_X)
afterwhich, we played SPARKLERSSSSSSS.
you know those kind of sticks which you light it up, and then it'll produce thousands of dazzling, glittering sparks?
i abandoned my otah for it. sorry otah!
bestest thing was....i was the video girl! 
taking video isn;t a very easy task because mainly i had to ensure that the whole footage was nicely taken and there weren't any strong jerks.
it can cause discomfort to the eyes, i heard. :D
finally, it was birthday boy's time!!!!!
all of us, and his thousands herds of friends gathered around a small table and we sang birthday songs in chinese and english!
(there were cracked voices of cheers after that. one of them belonged to mine :D)
i didn't get to eat the cake, :( , well, the alcohol really made me full.
which reminds me, i've gotta go work out tomorrow. GYM TIME! :D
the whole night was really fantastic.
and those kind that you'd want to live on forever.
and those that you wish to share with others.
and those that you can really call a happily ever after.
i really really love my cousins, i really do.
they just really make my day sometime, and it feels so good to be with them.
sometimes friends aren't the only ones that can bring you to the top of the world.
love y'all! we must invite each other to our own wedding okay!!!!!
kimberly! remember our oath to give birth to a whole contigent! :D
oops, that was so unglam. :D
nights, i'm going to finish one last question of physics, and then i'm doneeeee!
sometimes, blood is the one that matters,
not water.


When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.

Layout updated: 12th March 2007.
Best viewed in: Internet Explorer
Resolution: 1024px X 768px

Criminal Records

pulled dad's leg hair to get attention
kissed a car and a tomato
actually prayed hard to get to EM1
(dang, that was stupid)
love my cousins a lot! :)
needs a lamborghini roadster :DD
actually drowned once, (almost)
hates handphones, tracking devices...
loves GEOGRAPHY!!! <3333
FRANZ FERDINANZ and HITLER are da bombs!!! <33333
loves history, DUHH :)
hates jewelleries -_-
falling in love with skinnies :D
HEROES DA BOMB!!!! <333333
ah, i just love hollywood stuff *grins*

To-Do Crimes

get what i desire for mid years
just stay focused.
complete all revision by this week
go do something crazy for june holidays
take part in next year's parade<33333
and just hope that i'll be able to have more overseas opportunities.



Littlest Things

Brushes Deviantart
Images Yahoo
Font DaFont
Image Host Imageshack
Music Host Imeem
Ideas Vintage Layys
Base Codes Blu-black
Designer Jessica
Softwares Adobe Photoshop & Microsoft Frontpage

Pls do not rip off anything from here.
Much appreciated[: